Settling in to My New LLL Home
Nancy Mohrbacher Friday, September 9, 2011 at 10:38AM In a previous post, I described being booted from La Leche League (LLL) of IL, where I had worked as a Leader since 1982, for the crime of working as both a LLL Leader and a Breastfeeding USA (BFUSA) 
Breastfeeding Counselor. My accreditation with another organization was not surprising. Those who know me can testify that if breastfeeding is involved, you can count me in!
When I published my post, I was flooded with invitations from LLL Leaders and Area administrators who warmly welcomed me and extended their unconditional support. So many people wrote that it was impossible for me to respond personally to them all. If you were one, please accept my deepest thanks!
Although I had many LLL Areas to choose from, I decided what was most important to me was not the quality of its beaches (as one Florida Leader offered as an incentive) but whether my presence was likely to bring the LLL International (LLLI) hammer down on my new Area. I did not want to join a new team only to make their lives miserable by becoming a liability.
So when I received an invitation from LLL of Connecticut, I knew that this was a match made in heaven. These amazing ladies have become known for standing their ground against unreasonable LLLI policies and directives. Of course, disagreeing with LLLI’s administration these days is almost guaranteed to result in sanctions and threats, so when the LLL of CT Area team made its concerns known publicly, LLLI wrote them a letter accepting their resignations, which they had not offered. But LLL of CT has long been registered as its own nonprofit organization with the team as its legal representatives. This allowed them to thumb their noses and continue their work. They also bought their own liability insurance, so that could not be used as a weapon against them. When LLLI tried to convince other CT Leaders to take their places, these Leaders made it clear that this team had their full support.
I have a feeling I’ll fit right in with LLL of CT, which just yesterday became my official LLL Area. After all, as the saying goes, “Well-behaved women rarely make history.” As you might expect, my opinion on the issue that led to my actions has not changed. If anything, I am more convinced than ever that LLLI’s directive that Leaders must choose between LLL and BFUSA is divisive and therefore destructive to breastfeeding.
In recent weeks, people on the inside have confirmed that the goal of this directive is to undermine BFUSA, which includes ex-LLL Leaders among its founders. LLLI is headed down a slippery slope. In Illinois, nearly half of its Leaders have resigned in the last two years. It’s clearly time for it to look in the mirror and reevaluate its Leadership and its strategies.
I heard that one aspect of my actions was particularly upsetting to LLLI: my announcement on Facebook about my new BFUSA Breastfeeding Counselor status. Should I take this to mean that it’s all right for LLL Leaders to be involved with both organizations as long as they don’t say so publicly? Can we expect this to become LLLI’s version of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?”
If LLLI wants to grow and thrive, booting out those who question it is exactly the wrong approach. LLL Leaders have never been easily cowed. Those who breastfeed long term are clearly comfortable following a different drummer. They are not women who can be bullied into following directives that are obviously wrong. Take it from one who knows… or ask the Leaders in my new LLL Area.
Reader Comments (23)
Nancy, I'm so glad you've found a way to stay connected to LLL through CT. What an amazing bunch of women they are!
Congratulations, Nancy! LLL of CT is lucky to have you!!!
Welcome to LLL of CT Nancy! We're so happy to have you!
Wonderful that you can keep working with LLL! And with women I admire SO much. Still, I am glad those who have been effectively banned from the organization have other ways to share their skills. Breastfeeding help is NEEDED.
Fantastic! This is fabulous news, Nancy! Good for you for sticking to your guns, and I'm so glad to hear there is an Area that has this kind of working plan in place. Woot!
You are an inspiration to us all!
Thanks for taking this position so publicly. You are doing what the rest of us cannot: making plain the power mongering that belies a nurturing leadership who just wants to help. I still fear for the future of LLL but you are at least shining some light on its crazy workings.
Connecticut is lucky to have you and you them--you all are the type of LLL Leaders I looked up to as a new mom and spent years trying to become. I am glad that you are staying true to the concepts and helping mothers and babies.
How wonderful! So glad that you found a good fit. Though you have to admit Florida *does* have really awesome beaches. :)
~A
Nancy, Thank you so much for putting into words for this ME/NH Leader all of what I've been feeling! The responses of the Board to our treading water the best we can, and our trying to make sense out of all the nonsense all has felt so wrong. Love how you ended it.
You know having become a chiropractor in Illinois, in Lombard, I learned that the AMA had tried to undermine the chiropractic profession in many subtle and not so subtle ways. MDs were not to fraternize with chiropractors, they were not to refer patients to them, or accept patients referred from them. Turns out papers emerged that showed the AMA felt that chiropractors might take business away from them. Therefore all the orders not to fraternize and refer. They felt threatened. Instead they ended up years later losing a class action suit against them and having to write a long apology in their journal. Feeling threatened needs to be examined carefully and not reacted to with attacks on others. This whole situation with LLLI seems remarkably similar.
Welcome to the East Coast! See you at the CT Area Cf in the Spring?
Will you really have time to volunteer for so many organizations? Also, I seriously doubt your loyalty to anybody or any organization since you feel compelled not to resolve these issues internally but rather wash your dirty linen publicly.
Are you kidding- "Wash your dirty laundry publicly?" Is that what you would have said to Rosa Parks, or any other assertive women who stood tall for justice? LLL was founded by women who spoke up for what wasn't acceptable, but what was right- and that's our legacy to continue. CT is proud to have you join them- it's absolutely great news!
I find it interesting that you expressed concern for another Area by not becoming a liability, however you have not shown the same compassion for your home Area. Meaning that you were willing to put your fellow colleagues at risk. Your original home Area does not deserve the black balling you are spuing.
"I did not want to join a new team only to make their lives miserable by becoming a liability."
If you have a beef with the parent organization take it up with them.
LLL of IL's loss is LLL of CT's gain for sure. And ricki, I assure you that the parent organization knows well and good about Nancy's beef, as well as the beeves of thousands of other Leaders around the world. They just. don't. care. They would rather destroy LLL by forcing out its best and brightest to stick to their discredited chaordic organizational vision. While they accuse Leaders and Areas/ANs of jeopardizing "the brand," they themselves are the biggest threat to LLL's reputation and public identity.
LLL started this fight--but they count on those of us who disagree to go quietly away with out making waves or shedding light on what is happening inside the organization. Nancy's resignation from LLL of IL is just another step towards shedding light on how chaotic and petty many in this fine organization have become.
Having known Nancy personally and professionally, I can tell you that she is not one to put up with "nonsense"--and what LLL is doing to their Leaders and this organization is nonsense in its purest form. Penny in Tx is right--LLL does not care one bit about the LLLeaders. Their concern is about protecting the brand--not mother-to-mother support for those who chose to breastfeed.
I'm so glad for you - and for LLL of CT - that you found a new home!
Ricki, I don't blame you for not knowing about the years-long drama that has been going on with the poor leadership in charge of LLLI. After all, they have done their best to convince loyal LLL leaders that speaking out to try and save the organization would just be "airing dirty laundry" and has effectively shamed and silenced many women.
Nancy, for those who know the details of what is going on, and for those who have contacts behind the scenes, we are so very glad that you're willing to stand up and take some of the heat like the above comments show. Thank you for being willing to not be silenced and take that heat, because you can rise above it and aren't afraid.
Nancy, I have no doubt that LLL of CT is the *perfect* place for you to be. I'm sad you're not joining us here in MD, DE, DC, but I know that you will do amazing things joined to the CT area!
Woo Hoo! Hurray for you and LLL of CT. I'm sorry you didn't join us here in MA/RI/VT but sure am glad that you joined forces with the LLLovely Leaders in CT. Strong women for sure. You are so right about women who breastfeed long term being comfortable following a different drummer and not being bullied. We are a special breed for sure :-)
Congratulations! :)